Long time no see!

Eight months later I realise how terrible I am at keeping up with recording my thoughts, feelings and other school/career related things. This doesn’t just stop at blogging; I found my A4 planner in my box of ‘stuff to be filed’ at school yesterday. I’d not planned or diarised anything in there since the 31^st October. This also sounds how my QTS files look. Pretty empty!

As a trainee teacher, I would’ve thought that I would have learnt how to be organised. I thought wrong. Since the business of Summer Institute I have barely had time to think (or should that be ‘reflect’ TF buzz word!). I last blogged in August. It is now April. April. Where has the time gone?! In fact, I know where the time has gone.

My last 8 months have been spent: planning, driving (it’s a long way to school!), sleeping (or at least trying to sleep), planning (again), crying (almost a bi-weekly occurrence!),  shouting, some screaming, attempting to manage behaviour, marking, desperately re-considering my career choice, planning, marking, meetings, training, and maybe just a bit more planning and marking thrown in for good measure!

Thinking about the Teach First assessment centre seems like an absolute life time ago. But considering my progression between then and now (after 7 months in the classroom) I’m not quite so sure where I stand on many issues. Have I become an almost ‘teacher’? Am I good at my job? Will my year 10s ever listen to me? When will I develop that thick skin to deflect student insults? Confidence is clearly a key area in which I struggle. No matter how many times colleagues and mentors/tutors tell me I’m doing great- I still try and push aside their encouraging statements. I’m still aiming for ‘outstanding’ and killing myself in the process.  It is quite clearly not possible, at least for the moment.

Despite the constant struggles of the last 8 months (the sleepless nights, being knocked over by students, being sworn at in languages I don’t understand...) I wouldn’t change it for the world. There has most definitely been highs and lows but I don’t regret a single minute!  

What else have I failed to blog about? OFSTED. Oh yes. After a mere 5 weeks in the classroom, the suited man with his clip board strolled on in! Man: ‘Do you have QTS?’ Me: ‘No.’ Man: ‘So you’re not qualified?’ Me: ‘No’. Man: ‘Oh! I had no idea!’

However, if that situation was to re-emerge now, I don’t think I’d do so well. Is it possible to go backwards? I feel like September can’t come quick enough in some respects, just so I can start over. Maybe the Summer term would be a good place to start. 

So here is my ‘to do’ list for the remaining term of Teach First year 1:

Do my skills tests!

Do remaining written assignments.

Reign in the problem classes.

Cry no more!

Actually become a teacher.

Sort out the ks3 schemes of work. The existing SoW are horrific and I’m going to make it my goal to do something about that before September.

Make sure that school gets some kind of classroom management spying software stuff (how technical am I?). I can’t bare another lesson where children are sneakily tweeting across the room!

Plan the SoW for my A/s Law class I will (hopefully) have in September.

Try and develop some confidence and a thicker skin! Try.

And... blog. 

Week 3

Week 3 was over as soon as I had blinked. The first 3 days of which were spent in our actual placement schools (where we will be for 2 years). The few days mainly consisted of observations and information overload- particularly with regards to obtaining data for our upcoming inclusion assignment. However, during the hectic schedule, I did manage to do a starter with a year 7 group whom I suspect I will be teaching next year.

Doing the register for this sparky bunch of 11/12 year olds was one of the most petrifying things I have ever encountered. This was mostly because I was worried about mispronouncing names and appearing stupid (and ignorant). As there was no other member of staff there to guide me I took a shot at it alone. They waited outside the classroom until I let them in and told them to sit on the benches at the front. I was utterly surprised at how compliant they were- no 'Who are you and what are you doing here?' type of questions, complete compliance. As we went down the register, I asked each student to introduce themselves to me (giving me a chance to repeat their name back to them and check for pronunciation) and tell me what their favourite thing to do on a weekend would be. Although a little time consuming, it seemed to work a treat and most definitely gave me a little bit of practice with name pronunciation without sounding like a complete fool. Though not entirely conducive to learning, I opted for an ICT based Who Wants to be a Millionaire game. Their usual teacher then took over for the main part of the lesson. I followed the group to their next lesson which also happened to be ICT and found that they were shouting ‘Miss!’ when they needed help. I’m taking this as a sign that they (may) like me. Hopefully.

The three days in school felt nowhere near enough and once again, I found myself being shipped back off to Sheffield for the final few days of Yorkshire-based Professional Studies before we were all uprooted and moved to National Summer Institute at the University of Warwick.

Week 2 - 'School Experience' Week

After a Monday of insightful Professional Studies we were sent off into the world of ‘real’ education to see schools in context and practice a few lessons. 

I was lucky this week for two reasons: 1, I was placed in schools within a ten minute drive of my home so I could escape the hustle and bustle of TF halls, and 2, my fellow TF ICTer, Kate, had also been placed in the same school as me allowing us to team teach (which seemed slightly less scary than facing a class of 30 preying teenagers alone).  

In our first school we were well received by the head of ICT, the lovely Miss M. She was extremely keen for us to get stuck in during observations and thoroughly encouraged us to revel in the challenge of teaching our first class. Kate and I spent an hour or so towards the end of our first day planning our first lesson which was to be delivered to a small group of year 10s in the morning (about 20 of them were on a school trip) and a dauntingly larger group of 30 in the afternoon. 

After some guidance from Miss M, we decided to deliver a very basic refresher lesson on websites and audience/purpose to the year 10s, the theory being that this was something they would be looking at as part of their OCR Nationals on return in September. By relating the lesson topic to their future studies there was a slightly improved chance that the students would see the benefit of our lesson- as opposed to it being a single stand alone lesson. 

We ran through our lesson plan with Miss M. She seemed slightly apprehensive about the length of the tasks but we decided that if the lesson did run short, we would give out the student’s folders and ask them to carry on with their coursework. After going home and tidying up the PowerPoint and worksheet we had made, I tried to extend some of the tasks we had given in light of Miss M’s feedback. All in all, messing around with the PowerPoint (adding a few extra slides/images/text/colours), tidying up the worksheet and writing up a proper lesson plan took me approximately 4 hours! That was with distractions, I must add.... But still! 4 hours?! To plan one lesson! If that’s how long it takes me to plan one lesson, then God help my social life come September.

The morning came and I was moderately apprehensive about delivering my very first lesson. Though the lesson did finish early, most students were at least moderately engaged and most tried to participate. We asked for feedback from the group. One of the students who was very vocal during the session was quick off the mark to suggest that our Who Wants to be a Millionaire game was ‘boring and too easy’ but that was really by the by, and we had meant to pitch our lesson quite low. Contrary to that student’s opinion, Miss M told us that for him to actively participate in a lesson was amazing as he very rarely volunteered to answer questions at all! 

After a few more changes to the PP, we were ready to go for the second time around with a class of 30. Obviously, being bigger in number, the class were slightly more difficult to handle. I got to use the ‘You’re not listening to my colleague and I’m slightly offended’ raised voice, as well as a few of, what I would like to deem, ‘the look’ which proved useful, especially in such a good practice ground! The session, again, was a success, most of the students appeared to be on task and we managed to stretch out the lesson. Afterwards, we informed the students of our status and that it was only the second time we’d ever taught. They were genuinely impressed and gave us great feedback on the interactivity of the session and our confidence!

Evaluating the two days spent at that school, Miss M so kindly informed us that we were better than most of the PGCE students she’d had at that school and how happy they would’ve been to receive us as trainees. What a confidence boost!

The next day we were spent to a different school in the same area. At that school we encountered one of the most inspiring teachers we’d ever met as the head of ICT. I’m sure he won’t mind me mentioning his name and a little promotion of his website. 

James Greenwood (twitter: @jpgreenwood, website: http://www.james-greenwood.com/)filled us with enthusiasm and the greatest of tips to prepare us for steps into education. His persona (?) with the students was extremely entertaining and the way he was confronted with hugs and friendly back-slaps by students in the corridor (because he is leaving) was truly inspirational. High on my agenda for long-term career goals is to eventually maintain that kind of relationship with my students. James will be surely missed by his students as he jets off to pursue what will be a fantastic career at the other side of the world.

The days passed too quickly and I was soon being shipped back off to Sheffield to face the dread of more professional studies. Not that it is particularly dreadful... I just much prefer school!

Week 1 of Summer Institute

I spent very little time packing for Summer Institute. Everything I thought would be remotely useful went into my suitcase. I should have realised that this would be a very BAD IDEA. However, I stuck to my guns and proceeded to just pack my whole life.

After a very hot and sweaty hour drive to Sheffield, I said goodbye to my boyfriend and proceeded to struggle into Sheffield Hallam with my enormous suitcase (just to put it into context- the other day a taxi driver asked if I had a dead body in there). I was extremely nervous, and just a little scared. After meeting a few of my cohort we were given a quick tour of the university building and escorted onto the coach to our accommodation. 

Being in student halls was new for me as I’d never lived away from home whilst doing my degree. As I sat in my room in the empty flat, eagerly awaiting the arrival of ANYONE, I began to wonder what the hell I’d let myself in for.  When they did start to arrive I felt rather like a new Big Brother housemate. Everyone was talking fast, loud, and a lot. I hardly knew what to do with myself.

After a few short hours, we were ushered off to the Hilton in the city centre for a BBQ, which was lovely even though I was almost too nervous to eat. Everyone quickly slipped into the introductory routine of: name, subject, school which, looking back seemed almost pointless. I don’t think I remembered anything anyone said to me on that first evening.

Week one of Summer Institute was a total blur. Although it was only two weeks ago (and somewhat like everyone’s name, subject, school) I remember very little! Day one was excruciatingly long, and having being a ‘lazy student’ for so long, the inability to sleep and 5:45 am wake up did me no favours! By the end of the day all I could muster was, ‘Abbey. ICT. Bradford’.

The lectures that followed for the next 2 days were filled with words such as: pedagogy, lesson objectives, planning, SEAL, EAL, SEN, SLT, G&T, WA1, REFLECTION, journal and blah blah blah... I felt entirely out of my own depth. In fact, by the end of Tuesday I felt like I was going to have a nervous breakdown.

And then came Wednesday...

You will be glad to hear that Wednesday (and Friday for that matter) was the highlight of my week. We were placed into our ‘subject studies’ groups and luckily for The IT Crowd there was a very cosy 7 bodies: contributing to a much more relaxed and comfortable environment than the huge professional studies and leading learning groups. I felt much more at ease and gladly voiced my opinions, thoughts and feelings- unlike the other groups where I am yet to volunteer an answer (shhhhhhh)! 

Our group are all very down to earth and lovely, and our subject tutor is an absolute genius. He managed to put everything into perspective and suddenly I found the whole experience slightly less daunting.

On Friday, another successful subject studies day ensued and I left Sheffield for home feeling (almost) positive about the whole experience.

Before Teach First

My blog title is a phrase that I’m sure every single ICT teacher whispers (or screeches!) in their sleep. Personally, I haven’t had chance to utter these words to class of 30 rowdy, mouse-clicking, keyboard-bashing, music-listening teenagers. Yet I fear the day is looming ever closer which, quite frankly, impregnates me with fear. Don’t get me wrong, I’m much more comfortable standing in front of a class of excitable teens than a room of glaring peers, but the prospect of ‘doing it alone’ for the very first time and knowing that the majority of my teaching career rests on that very first hour is absolutely petrifying.

I decided to begin this blog as a means of tracking my progression and developing as a reflective, trainee teacher. After the idea had been thrown around by several colleagues, I have decided to give it a go. I am making no promises as to the length of this operation as I’m sure, come September, I will be almost completely absorbed by lesson planning, amongst other woes. I do not intend that this blog will be the most articulate or creative outlet of personal experiences: I am an ICT teacher after all! All I hope is that it presents a blunt, no nonsense and straight-forward account of my experiences as a trainee, and beyond.

My teaching journey began in October 2010 as an eager 3^rd year Criminal Justice and Law Student. After having a chat with a delightful Teach First ambassador and graduate recruiter at the university careers fair, I decided to further research the cause. Teaching had always been an option for me, yet Teach First presented a unique opportunity. The idea of being thrust into the classroom after a mere six week training period was absolutely terrifying but the support and opportunities presented by the charity seemed to far outweigh the fright. 

A few days after sending off my application, I was invited to London for the assessment centre. The day was mostly a blur. The only significant thought I remember having was, ‘All these candidates with their Oxbridge education, posh accents and worldly experience.  I do not have a chance in hell.’ Note: I was educated at a ‘poly’, have quite a strong Yorkshire accent and little worldly experience. You see my point. Despite having my purse stolen on the tube, I left London with a slight feeling of optimism. I knew I’d done my best and maybe- just maybe- my Northern twang would set me apart from some of the others. 

At around 3pm the next day, I’d almost lost all hope. After reading several forums, I had a good idea that most candidates who had been provisionally accepted onto the programme received a phone call the day after. I think I received the call at around 3:30, and on receiving the news- I burst into tears.  I couldn’t believe my luck. Me... A teacher?

In the following months I completed countless numbers of forms in preparation for my Teach First journey, as well attending TF socials, ‘School Orientation Experiences’, studying for my degree finals, holding up a part-time job and maintaining a social life. It was tricky but I made it through. 

Summer Institute, here I am.